[Germanauto]

The whole "numb" thing about BMWs now is indeed very true, whether or not it's a deal-breaker is up to you. It's not like Audi or Mercedes are much better in this area.

To me it sounds like an M340, C43, or S4/S5 Sportback are good options for you. The forthcoming 4-series Gran Coupe or M3 are options too. You don't need an SUV in the household. An M2 would be very fun to drive and is the only BMW whose steering meets my expectations, but it's not as luxurious or practical as the 3-series. Now in regards to the C43 specifically, I just drove one halfway across California and while it has its merits (namely power and exhaust note), the thing does not feel planted during high speed turns and the steering is somewhat loose and disconnected. It is more of a heavy German muscle car than a nimble sports car.

The Alfa Giulia is a fun lively sedan to drive but it comes with its shortcomings, which is especially true since you intend to keep your new car for many years. The refreshed Genesis G70 seems like a solid choice but nobody knows what its reliability record will be like. Tesla Model 3 is another good option since you have the minivan for long drives, but personally I do not find it to be a luxurious or well-built vehicle plus it's incredibly common.