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      09-28-2019, 08:26 AM   #1
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Cool Do you use vulgar language?

just wanted to get an insight from all of you when I comes to speaking with or without vulgar language. I never put much thought into it until I was invited to my next door neighbor's BBQ Friday afternoon. just a small get together with probably 5 other neighbors who I know but not so much on a personal level who all live within the same cul-de-sac. so I forgot what the conversation was but I remember blurting out "are you shitting me!" I guess it annoyed him a bit and than he continued on where I eventually ended up replying "Dude, they're full of shit!"

now that's when he stopped me and said

him: "do you need to using vulgar language?"
me: "what?"
him: "do you need to use cursing language?"
me: "ummm I guess it depends"
him: "really?"
me: "did I offend you?"
him: "no but I find it quite distracting when you use cursing language"
me: "so it bothers you I use vulgar language sometimes?"
him": "you shouldn't speak that way because you may offend people who may not accept the colorful language you use"

so this is where my smart ass came in because i was actually offended that someone was telling me how to properly speak or how to speak

me: "well never had i had anyone tell me when and where to use vulgar language until today. obviously you have an issue but no one else is saying anything so maybe it's just you?"

he decided to stop there and change the subject as the rest of the guys were kinda chuckling about what they were hearing. one of the guys said to him "hey bro, just relax...it's a BBQ! why don't you go over to the cooler and have a fucking beer!"

what do you guys think? do you use vulgar/curse language all the time, sometimes, when it's proper? my buddy can't speak without say "F" in every sentence, it's quite hilarious and he says it's part of the English language. most of my friends cuss all the time. family members yell out cursive language almost on a daily basis. even the CEO of the company i work for uses cursive language. so what are your thoughts?
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Last edited by lsturbointeg; 09-28-2019 at 12:13 PM..
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      09-28-2019, 08:31 AM   #2
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Fuck no
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      09-28-2019, 08:46 AM   #3
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Depends who I’m around. If I don’t know someone in the group I avoid referring to anyone as a fucking cunt or cocksucker, etc. However, I probably don’t filter out the word “shit” unless I happen to know I am with someone who doesn’t swear at all and may be offended by it (and there is only one person like that I know). There are levels to this IMO.
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      09-28-2019, 08:51 AM   #4
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Fuckin' eh.
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      09-28-2019, 08:53 AM   #5
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If the truth be told, I usually gear my language to the company I'm in. For example if I was in church ( which is almost never ) I'd refrain, but in social settings I usually ease into it, or wait for someone else to launch the first F bomb and then I'm in.
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      09-28-2019, 08:54 AM   #6
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Tbh maybe it’s time to tone it down. I picked up a visiting family member from the airport on thursday, and during the drive he said “i’d forgotten how it’s like to be with someone who curses so much”

Of course i told him to GFY
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      09-28-2019, 09:14 AM   #7
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A loooong time ago, when I was stationed at Ft. Hood, TX, a buddy and I were in a store and I saw a girl behind a counter ripping the covers off new magazines and throwing them away. I thought I asked her, "what are you doing?" She looked at me with a bit of a shocked expression (this was in the early 80's, so things were a bit different then). She then explained what she was doing and why. When we got outside, my buddy said, "I can't believe you said that her." Apparently I had asked her "What the fuck are you doing?" I never realized I had dropped the F bomb. It had become such a natural way for me to speak, apparently. That's when I started being far more aware of my language.

Times have certainly changed, though. A few years ago I worked at a school within the Univ. of Illinois where students earned a Masters level degree and went immediately into the corporate world. Several Fortune 500 companies would come to our school and interview students. The students would be dressed in serious corporate world suits (both men and women). There was a ladies room near my office and there would often be a line waiting to get in. I could hear the women waiting in line talking about their interviews. I was often stunned by the liberal use of the F bomb as they were talking. It seemed so out of place with people all dolled up in corporate attire, but I guess that's just me being old-school.

To the OP, I don't consider the word shit to be vulgar or offensive. That's a pretty sensitive neighbor you got there. Although I was once written up by a student for using the word "damn" in a sentence. So there are all different levels of sensitivity out there, I guess.
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      09-28-2019, 09:35 AM   #8
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I used to but now I don't use them in regular conversation especially when we started having kids.

I don't mind others using it though.

It makes it more special when I use them as when they hear it coming from me means I am seriously bothered.

Don't want to be controversial, but saw an article where using vulgar language is a compensation for something else. It is actually more difficult to not use them now.
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      09-28-2019, 09:56 AM   #9
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I used to a lot and was actually famous amongst my friends for "Cussing like a sailor". Eventually professional life forced me to tone it down considerably. With my friends, i go all out because I know them well and they let loose too so it is mutual . Of course, around the wife it is a constant reminder of what word I let out, when, how many times in a sentence, etc. so trying to fix that too.
But with random strangers, acquaintances, I dance around the words until I know they are comfortable OR waiting for them to use it first so I could let loose lol. My go to's are - Son of a gun, Holy Smokes, Darn, Fudge, etc. etc. Usually people that want to let loose start throwing out the actual cuss words and then the conversation becomes more fluid to say the least

Some people are way too sensitive and I would suggest to exercise caution with others until you know them good enough. A girl i dated once told me, you are great in all aspects but because of you using "God Dammit" again and again she felt like she should break up. That was a good cue for me to know that some people are just different and I appreciate other people telling me that so I could either get away from them OR speak in a respectful way that they deem acceptable.

But f**k yeah, I like to cuss every chance I get. I find people who cuss out expressing their frustration/ expressions as more trustworthy in general.
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      09-28-2019, 10:24 AM   #10
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I do it around friends and adults depending on the situation. My hard rule is to never use these words around kids or people that are easily impressionable. I know they will see or hear it on the internet, school and just about everywhere else, but I would rather not be the one where they learned it from. I grew up in a pretty strict household and cursing was never to be heard. I respect my parents for not exposing me to foul language and I will do the same for kids growing up.
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      09-28-2019, 10:39 AM   #11
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depends on the company, not around kids
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      09-28-2019, 10:39 AM   #12
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Rarely, only when angry and not in full control. I have a better vocabulary than that, and prefer my limited wit when I have my wits about me!
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      09-28-2019, 10:54 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Yessir View Post
I do it around friends and adults depending on the situation. My hard rule is to never use these words around kids or people that are easily impressionable. I know they will see or hear it on the internet, school and just about everywhere else, but I would rather not be the one where they learned it from. I grew up in a pretty strict household and cursing was never to be heard. I respect my parents for not exposing me to foul language and I will do the same for kids growing up.
Same with my parents. My Dad worked at a trucking company and occasionally had to go into work on Saturdays. He would bring my brother and me along so we could run around the terminal while he did whatever he had to do. I loved these trips because Dad always bought donuts and I loved them when I was a kid. Mom wasn't big on us eating donuts, so it was a treat.

So one nasty winter day we went into work with Dad. The electric gate to the terminal yard had been frozen shut. He and another guy were working on it and talking to my brother and me over the intercom. He had us push the open/close button in the office to test if the gate would move. At one point while he was talking to us I asked if he was still going to get some donuts. The intercom was still live and we heard him say to the other guy, "Do you believe this kid? Always thinking about his fucking stomach." My brother and I looked at each other in total shock. We had never, ever heard my father cuss or even raise his voice at home. We were stunned.

Years later I had a co-worker that had worked for my Dad at the same company. Dad was a supervisor and this guy was a dock worker and driver. He told me stories about my Dad that made me realize there was a whole side of his personality that I had never seen. Apparently my Dad, who had infinite patience with us at home, was a terror at work. He wouldn't put up with a driver who couldn't back a truck into the dock or a dock worker who couldn't load a truck properly. He had a rep as a tough as nails boss. He was a perfect example of someone who knew when and where to cuss and when not to.
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      09-28-2019, 11:27 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lsturbointeg View Post
just wanted to get an insight from all of you when I comes to speaking with or without vulgar language. I never put much thought into it until I was invited to my next door neighbor's BBQ Friday afternoon. just a small get together with probably 5 other neighbors who I know but not so much on a personal level who all live within the same cul-de-sac. so I forgot what the conversation was but I remember blurting out "are you shitting me!" I guess it annoyed him a bit and than he continued on where I eventually ended up replying "Dude, they're full of shit!"

now that's when he stopped me and said

him: "do you need to using vulgar language?"
me: "what?"
him: "do you need to use cursive language?"
me: "ummm I guess it depends"
him: "really?"
me: "did I offend you?"
him: "no but I find it quite distracting when you use cursive language"
me: "so it bothers you I use vulgar language sometimes?"
him": "you shouldn't speak that way because you may offend people who may not accept the colorful language you use"

so this is where my smart ass came in because i was actually offended that someone was telling me how to properly speak or how to speak

me: "well never had i had anyone tell me when and where to use vulgar language until today. obviously you have an issue but no one else is saying anything so maybe it's just you?"

he decided to stop there and change the subject as the rest of the guys were kinda chuckling about what they were hearing. one of the guys said to him "hey bro, just relax...it's a BBQ! why don't you go over to the cooler and have a fucking beer!"

what do you guys think? do you use vulgar/cursive language all the time, sometimes, when it's proper? my buddy can't speak without say "F" in every sentence, it's quite hilarious and he says it's part of the English language. most of my friends cuss all the time. family members yell out cursive language almost on a daily basis. even the CEO of the company i work for uses cursive language. so what are your thoughts?


cursive

Cursive is a style of writing in which all the letters in a word are connected. It's also known as script or longhand. When the third-grade students learned cursive writing, they were excited to find that they could write entire words without lifting their pencil from the paper.

https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/cursive

I think you meant "cursing"

https://www.jw.org/en/bible-teaching...s-cursing-bad/
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      09-28-2019, 11:50 AM   #15
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      09-28-2019, 12:05 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SakhirM4 View Post


cursive

Cursive is a style of writing in which all the letters in a word are connected. It's also known as script or longhand. When the third-grade students learned cursive writing, they were excited to find that they could write entire words without lifting their pencil from the paper.

https://www.vocabulary.com/dictionary/cursive

I think you meant "cursing"

https://www.jw.org/en/bible-teaching...s-cursing-bad/
you're right my computer auto correct me lol! I will correct it lol!
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      09-28-2019, 01:15 PM   #17
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Fuck yeah! Unless I'm in a business meeting or some kind of business setting which is rare since I work from home. I don't tend to ever be hanging out around a whole lot of people I don't know. Only time I'm really ever around a lot of people I don't know is at the racetrack and those bastards curse like sailors so.

My business partner use to curse like crazy and still does, but now he has kids so he's always bitching at me to stop cursing when the kids are around. I cannot turn off this glorious gift just because your little shits are around. If you don't want them to hear the gospel then keep them the fuck away from me!
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      09-28-2019, 02:01 PM   #18
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In general I avoid swearing or vulgar language. It doesn't make me sound any smarter so why do it? I need all the help I can get!

My wife is absolutely turned off by vulgar language and we have little kids so my days are rated PG most of the time

Does it offend me when I hear it? No. But there are certain words that kinda make me cringe. In the situation you provided, I see no harm. That dude needs to lighten up and pull the stick out of his vagina
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      09-28-2019, 02:16 PM   #19
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I don’t play golf anymore so my cursing went down about 98%. I hate that fucking game.

I’ve curved it quite a bit from when I was younger, but I’m still human. Sometimes it just feels good to let out an F, F u or F off. Generally while I’m driving by myself.
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      09-28-2019, 02:24 PM   #20
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I don't curse much at all anymore, but don't usually care when others do. The only time I get annoyed is when it's every sentence, but I would get annoyed if you used the same word in every sentence if it wasn't a curse word either.
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      09-28-2019, 02:29 PM   #21
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I use "less offensive" words when shooting the shit around friends .....similiar to the situation it sounded like you were in.

But it's typically related to whom I'm dealing with. If they don't speak that way, I try to respect them and talk the same dialogue.

But it's on a case by case basis. Now if I get really pissed, I've been known to drop a few words regardless of whom is around except for kids.
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      09-28-2019, 02:45 PM   #22
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When you’re a guest, it would be smart to follow the hosts lead. The older I get, I believe that your language reflects your intelligence or lack there of. If it’s a group of buddies and no ladies are around, it may get a little salty.
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